


held my tongue

by afluffykiwi



Series: the bitter birdflash chronicles [5]
Category: Young Justice (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Artemis is a good friend. tough love., Depressed Wally, Explicit Language, Friendship, Gen, M/M, Mentions of Sex, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicidal Wally, Timeskip Era, i guess?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-07
Updated: 2016-03-07
Packaged: 2018-05-25 06:05:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,352
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6183586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/afluffykiwi/pseuds/afluffykiwi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Sure. Whatever floats your boat, Baywatch.” She sipped her drink, bringing her fishtail braid over her shoulder.</p>
            </blockquote>





	held my tongue

“So. Let's talk about Dick.”

Wally paused, corners of his mouth pulling down as he took a long gulp of coffee. He didn't know when he'd started drinking the stuff; he could barely get away with decaf when he was younger. It made him too hyper. But now it barely put a dent in the lingering exhaustion that hounded him day and night. Artemis had her tea set to the side and she was staring him down hard. He sank down in his chair petulantly.

“There’s nothin’ to talk about.” He muttered, hooking his foot behind the back of the other ankle.

“Bullshit.” She raised a brow. “You guys have been boyfriends for what, 4 years?”

“Almost. Are we counting the break?”

“Sure. Whatever floats your boat, Baywatch.” She sipped her drink, bringing her fishtail braid over her shoulder. “You’ve been together for years- best friends since you were both basically fetuses. And you’re telling me there’s nothing now?”

“Nothing to  _ talk  _ about.”

“We can talk about your late night fuck sessions.”

He tensed, shooting her a glare and she just looked so proud of herself. 

“Yeah, Walls, you’re not as stealthy as you guys think. How long has it been going on? Because it happened not one week after you moved in so it had to start before you did.”

Truth be told he hadn’t expected it to continue. After Artemis had swooped in and dragged him from the crappy apartment in the shitty part of town and basically made him move in with her- he thought Dick would stop coming. But the acrobat figured he was stealthy enough to get away with it and neither of them were particularly loud.

“I dunno.” He shrugged. “Coupl’a months?”

6 months and two and a half weeks, to be exact. Which he was. His memory was near perfect and he couldn’t forget the day if he tried. 6 months and nothing had really been fixed between them. Dick texted him, Wally unlocked his window, they did it, Dick left, Wally went on with his life. Each time left him more and more hollow, made it harder to get up the next morning when he could imagine the ache that would be left behind if he didn’t have accelerated healing.

He popped the lid off the cup and dipped his finger into the whipped cream before sucking it off the digit. Stalling.

“Really. And how is it working out for you guys.”

“Just peachy.”

“You always say that. Look me in the eyes and actually have some light in yours.”

He couldn’t do that. He wished he was dead. 

Sometimes he wondered if he’d actually be able to off himself. He knew that it would probably not be a good thing to do. He knew he was probably depressed and that he should probably get help. But when did he ever get help?

He heard her sigh, sitting harshly back in her chair, the breath tense and frustrated. Was she worried? Was she just annoyed? He couldn’t tell. He didn’t even jump when she snatched up his wrist, shaking it until he looked up at her.

“Wally, you need to end this.”

His eyes went a little wide before they narrowed, yanking his arm free.  
“And why would I do that?”

“Because this is killing you. Damn it, have you looked in the mirror lately? You look like shit. Some days you don’t get out of bed. You haven’t been eating. You need to talk to someone, get medication, something.”

“Arty, my brain issues have nothing to do with my relationship.”

“Of course it does!” She sat forward. “I know you. This isn’t satisfying you- you need more than just sex, you need that emotional connection. And Dick… Dick can’t give that to you right now.”

He flinched because… she was right. Everyone could see Dick’s descent into the Batman-esque side of him. And that was why they both turned to the fucking. It helped Dick feel something.

“Wally, you can’t sacrifice yourself for him. You can’t kill yourself to keep him alive. This isn’t healthy. And it’d be better for both of you to end it.”

He clenched his jaw shut, tapping on the table for a few seconds before pushing back and standing. 

“Fine.  Whatever.”

He turned and stormed out of the coffee shop, chest tight and stomach filled with dread.

~

Wally sat on his bed, bare legs crossed as he started down at the phone laying in front of them. The window was unlocked and he was already in just his underwear- it was night and he’d just changed things up.

‘I need you’ glowed on the screen and looking at it made him feel… excited? Excited and that hollowness was still there along with that dread that followed him all day. Dick had yet to respond, he usually called the shots and Wally was at his beck and call. But they had meant something to each other before so maybe Dick would show.

Yep. The window slid open and he spared it a glance before setting the phone to the side. He lay on his back and seconds later Dick was on him- boots kicked off and lips to his throat. Wally shivered and sighed, eyes falling shut as he tilted his head back and to the side to give Dick more room. He could feel the slight scrape of stubble and teeth against the soft skin and it made him moan softly.

~

Wally sat up after Dick had gotten up to throw the used condom away, quickly tugging his boxers back on before he stood up as well. He quickly made his way over to Dick, startling the other man when he turned around and found Wally inches away from him. 

The redhead swallowed and took hold of Dick’s wrist, gently easing him back to the bed. Dick watched him warily, sat down beside him and kept watching. Wally swallowed, keeping his gaze down to where he was rubbing the inside of Dick’s wrist with his thumb. He was afraid. He was sure Dick could tell.

“Wally? What’s up.”

“Dickwecan’tkeepdoingthis.” The words were blurted out hastily.

Dick was silent for a long moment. “Wally… you know I can’t understand speed talk.”

Wally glanced up, feeling nauseous as he sighed. Go slower this time.

“Dick. We can’t keep doing this.”

The other man stiffened and his wrist jerked, tried to get lose but Wally held on. No. Dick didn’t get to run away until Wally had finished. His face hardened and he turned to face Dick squarely.

“Stop that. Wait until I’m done, you owe me that much.”

“I owe you?” The teen sneered, and Wally felt the harshness cut at him.

“Hell yes, you owe me.” He snapped back. “I’ve been your boy toy for the past 7 months, the least you can give me is the time to explain.

“You’re not my boy toy.” Dick muttered and Wally scoffed, rolling his eyes.

“Is your fuck toy better? That’s all I am to you now. And I can’t live like that. Artemis thinks this is killing me and I think she’s right.” He swallowed. “You used to love me. A-and I need love, I-I need more than this.” He gestured to the room. “I… I need you to be my boyfriend again, or this ends.”

Dick was quiet for a long moment, brow pinched. He looked very young all of the sudden and it just made Wally feel very tired. He let go of Dick’s hand and turned to crawl back under the covers. The emptiness took hold of him again and he was ready to lose himself in it.

“Whatever. Just go.”

“Wally, I-”

“Please, Dick? I can’t do this.”

He shut his eyes, listened to Dick pull his uniform back on. He heard the window slide open and the long pause before someone climbed out- felt Dick’s gaze on his back. He didn’t turn.

As the window slid shut he wondered if he could just suffocate himself in his pillow. He decided it was too much effort. 


End file.
